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Post: Darla at the Edge of the World: A Group Writing Project

Tue, 03 Mar 2015 18:08:35 GMT

TitusAndronicusForever
Tue, 03 Mar 2015 18:08:35 GMT

This is an awesome opener to a story. I love the last two lines. Might have to try my hand at a new section.

Akaless
Tue, 03 Mar 2015 18:41:21 GMT

I like how open ended this story is. There's a lot of cool ways to go, but I wouldn't be disappointed if this was the man with the pipe: [Tumblr_static_archer-628](//muut.com/u/tethered/s1/:tethered:U8r9:tumblr_static_archer628.jpg.jpg)

Caed
Tue, 03 Mar 2015 19:51:15 GMT

I'm definitely curious. I thought maybe these girls were maliciously forced on a rooftop they'd have to jump off of (thinking of _Divergent_) until someone had a cigarette, like this scary rooftop jumping thing was so expected. And there was no timer or something that marked when they'd jump so WHY are they doing it SERIOUSLY WHY

marleyjames18
Tue, 03 Mar 2015 21:01:30 GMT

“Awesome. You haven’t slept, and you haven’t eaten. So basically all you’ve done today is chainsmoke and get on my nerves. Such a contribution you’re making to the team here.” Phaedre gives a slow clap. -this section made me actually stop and laugh out loud. So sarcastically brilliant. I love it. This is such an interesting opener, I can't wait to see where it gets taken!

Hugh Hartigan
Wed, 04 Mar 2015 00:50:03 GMT

Great cliffhanger! This will be an awesome lead-in to the next part of the story!

TSMDavies
Wed, 04 Mar 2015 20:27:48 GMT

Very nice way to lead in someone else to take up the story. I couldn't help thinking that the guy with the pipe told convinced them they could... Uh oh. Guess I should write it...

Bagpuss
Mon, 09 Mar 2015 13:41:25 GMT

This was great. I love the sense of nervousness which comes through the narrative, and the ending was very tingly too

Akaless
Mon, 09 Mar 2015 20:50:35 GMT

Backstory! Now that we know a little about how they got here, where do you think they'll go? I'm thinking heist.

Dani Hedlund
Tue, 10 Mar 2015 14:59:47 GMT

Why is everything a heist with you, Joe? NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS THE THIEVERY SKILLS OF CHERRY BOMB. NOT EVERY TEXT MESSAGE IS A "SLEEP TERRORISTS" FROM THE MAYOR!

Dani Hedlund
Tue, 10 Mar 2015 15:01:04 GMT

ALSO, (wow, gotta turn the anger-educed caplocks off), Ruben, I love where you took this story. Leave it to you to turn this into a media-fueled snuff film.

rstemple
Tue, 10 Mar 2015 20:36:48 GMT

Thanks Dani, it was a great starter and I kept thinking that it sounded like some sort of reality show. The death and dying part was just a bonus ;) Can't wait to see where the next author takes us!

TSMDavies
Wed, 11 Mar 2015 15:45:52 GMT

I'm curious to know just hat it was that finally swayed Darla to join in. But I like where it ends. Nice chance for additions again.

rstemple
Wed, 11 Mar 2015 17:07:12 GMT

I'm sure that the next author already has a good motivating factor for Darla... Maybe money, maybe fame, maybe recapturing her youth, maybe she has a fantasy about proving it all a lie, maybe she's a sinister alien who has secretly set this all up in an effort to make the human race devalue life itself. Or maybe she hates authors who write really long sentences with a lot of "maybe's" in them and decided that it would be better to jump off of a building.

Hannah
Sat, 14 Mar 2015 18:07:44 GMT

I loved the new direction the second instalment took us in. That executive recruiter dude is so creepy though. I found him more harrowing than the whole base-jumping thing.

Dani Hedlund
Mon, 23 Mar 2015 14:48:34 GMT

Is anyone else freaked out that they jumped off a building in Boston and ended up on a beach? I'm thinking...dimensional portal! COME ON! SOMEONE TURN THIS INTO A SCI-FI!

LKScribbler
Tue, 24 Mar 2015 21:41:23 GMT

Ooh! I'm loving this new project! I love that Ruben made it a reality TV show. How unexpected. Every addition is really moving the story along. Great work everyone!

TJones
Fri, 27 Mar 2015 21:10:02 GMT

This story is awesome, guys! She should totally take over as lead in the show...

mbaustin
Sat, 18 Apr 2015 01:13:55 GMT

Ooh, a deal with the devil - a few months of fame and adrenaline highs, then a fake death, and .... start a new life in a part of the world with no reality TV access? Is there such a place? Seems like Darla might like that, if she doesn't have to go to prison, instead. Maybe she's a poor shot, and the creepy dude's only wounded. Can't wait to find out!

TJones
Mon, 20 Apr 2015 17:39:33 GMT

I LOVE THIS ENDING! Wow...how dark, and amazing. I love that they're about to be destroyed by a monster of their own making!

LKScribbler
Tue, 21 Apr 2015 15:52:30 GMT

That was a great ending! Nicely done, Asa!